Call them what you will, ‘chat up lines’ or ‘pick up lines’ don’t actually work. Get the idea out of your head now! You may have the perfect chat up line, one you’ve spent months perfecting, but nothing works better than simply introducing yourself and saying Hi!
Many guys see women as the same and think that chat up lines and tricks will work. Wrong! There’s quote about this in classic sitcom, Red Dwarf.
‘You see [women] as some alien species that you need to conquer with trickery. They are people!’
This sums up many guys approach to talking to women.
You really need to get out of the mindset that you can go up to a woman and try an opening line or perhaps a trick like ‘accidentally’ bumping into them so you can start talking to them. Women tend not to like it, trust me.
Women think chat up lines are cheap
And they are right. A chat up line is something you learn or make up so you can pretend confidence. Women are unique and expect to treated so, wouldn’t you? So don’t pull out another cheap one-liner that you use on every girl,she’ll think you are doing it just to ‘get’ her, rather than actually starting a conversation with her naturally and more importantly, she’ll know you are not treating her like an individual and that you are not being yourself.
According to a study by Edinburgh University, when 127 female subjects were tested using compliments and chat up lines. Guess what? The study found that women do not respond well to chat up lines.
However, talking about the surroundings or situation was more successful. So rather than ‘was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?’ You should try talking about the music.
Sexy chat up lines
The study also tested sexy chat up lines and, surprise surprise, they were the least successful.
The researchers came up with a theory that these lines are used in order to find out which women are more likely to be up for a one bight stand– explaining why some pick up artists systems claim they know exactly what is needed to pick up women.
Generally, confidence is an attractive quality. It takes more guts to be able to walk up to someone and say Hi than with a false purpose like a chat up line. The chat up line is a sort of wall you can build to hide behind because you have no confidence – the chat up line is false confidence. You need to break down this false confidence and be yourself. Break the ice with you, being you, rather than a line which is not you.
Another thing women find attractive is authenticity – you being yourself. Chat up lines and false compliments are totally obvious – the object of your desires knows you are using a line and therefore, are neither confident nor authentic because you have to use a chat up line.
Many dating advice systems say that men should offer compliments as an ice breaker. No no no! From a women’s perspective – this is huge turn off. The idea is by offering these compliments you are asserting yourself as confident and powerful. The reality is most confident women will see right through this and be offended. And, of course it’s not being authentic.