So you want to go speed dating in London? Well it can be a difficult business to get right. Do you flirt do you not flirt? Reveal your secrets or keep your cards close to your chest? Here is our ultimate guide to speed dating success in London.
1) Stand up straight
Tall people tend to command attention. Posture is very important. Do not slouch. Do not stare at the floor. Keep your chin up and your shoulders back but do not look rigid.
2) Eye contact
Eye contact is critically important. If you make eye contact with your date it means you are engaged with what they are saying. You also need to make eye contact when you speak as this give you authority and ensure the other person listens to you and doesn’t get distracted
Smile and the whole world smiles with you. Everyone loves a smiley person. It makes you more attractive especially to strangers
Laugh at your dates jokes. Even if they aren’t that funny. Laughing conveys sense of humour and makes everyone believe you are a fun person to be around.
5) Be flirty
If you are speed dating in London you will not have much time to make an impression so ensure your conversation is flirty where possible as that will trigger emotion in whoever you would like to meet later
6) Be interested
Do not talk too much about yourself or your potential date may think you are not interested. Make sure your conversation is balanced between finding out about your date and you selling yourself.
This is a date not an interrogation. So you need to give off a relaxed vibe. You need to have a calm and balanced demeanour. However dont be too chilled out or your date may think you are not interested.
8) Prepare questions
Ensure you have a bank of questions in your head so that you never run out of things to say. For a list of speed dating questions check out this post here.
9) Dont drink too much
Having a couple of glasses of wine is fine but if you come across drunk to your date they will think. you are not serious and move on
Be kind and courteous to your potential partner. Do not try and flirt with others while you are speaking with your speed date. That is rude and will get you nowhere.
11) Conversation topics
Keep the conversation light-hearted and fun. Avoid heavy topics such as politics, religion and race. Avoid swearing too. Travel, interests and life passions are always good starting points for conversation with someone new.
12) The judge wont budge
Its important to not be too opinionated or to judge your new date. Save that for when you get married! Even if you disagree with a person, don’t say ‘I hate people who do that’ or ‘that makes absolutely no sense to me’ just nod and smile and move the conversation in a different direction.
13) Personal hygiene
Who is attracted to someone hairy and smelly. Answer…Nobody. Sounds like a formality but its always amazing how many people break this basic rule. Speed dating events can be held in small and overcrowded places so always best to overdo it with the fragrances.
14) Desperate and needy
The point of a speed dating event is you will have the chance to get your favourite dates contact details easily. Dont rush to force a number on somebody within 30 seconds. Make a mental note of who you like so you can get their details later on
15) Keep notes
The speed dating event organisers should give you some kind of score card to remember your favourite dates. Make sure you use it.
16) Dont Linger
When the bell rings wrap up your conversation. Timing and politeness is important here. Cut short your meeting too sharply and you risk offending your date. Stay too long and you risk causing irritating your fellow dating friends.
17) Give signals of intent
Of course you don’t want to declare undying love to someone you met 2 minutes ago. But if you did enjoy your conversation with your speed date be sure to let them know with a smile and a parting comment such as ‘it was great meeting you – hope to see you again later’.
18) Dont quit too soon
Chances are with a short speed date you will have just laid the foundation for a future meeting – perhaps. After the speeding dating is complete you should get the opportunity to chat and mingle. Dont waste this opportunity. You are as likely to connect with someone here as at any other point in the evening
19) Movers are winners
Studies show approaching someone (as opposed to being approached) makes you seem more attractive. In speed dating there will be sitters. People who sit still, and movers the people that move chairs when the bell rings – to move on to the next date. Given the choice be a mover!
20) Throw your preconceptions out the window
Everyone believes they have a strict set of criteria for a potential mate. And that a partner must meet this criteria. The reality is different. Ultimately all of us simply want; a non-crazy, friendly, good-looking partner with reasonable prospects for the future.