We all know first impressions count but what happens if your first impression unintentionally comes across as a little creepy? Lets picture this scenario. If youre at a party in London and you go up to talk to a group of new friends and within a few seconds they make excuses and disappear you might be coming across as weird. When youre out meeting new friends in London make sure you dont make these common mistakes…
1) Dont act like a creep around new friends in London
A creep is someone who is eerily quiet as if there is something dark which they dont want you to know about. Creepy people have a dark lamenting side waiting for something to push it over. If you are coming across as creepy, you must be doing some of the things these weird people would do. Dont worry, you probably dont even know that youre doing it – it can be quickly sorted out with understanding and practise. Body language and appearance are important here. Make sure you are well groomed, youve washed your hair and youve got your best aftershave or perfume on. Ensure you also have good posture, keep your back straight and make solid eye contact with whoever you talk to.
2) Dont play the rock star
The chances are its just because you are a little different. Individuality is a great thing – never forget that – but sometimes in order to allow others to accept you may have to tone it down a little. Its very easy to resent people because they think you are strange because you live your life differently but youve got to remember, people will judge you and sometimes they will get it wrong but youre never going to be able to stop the process. By making your appearance, image and actions a little more accessible you are raising the chances of people getting to know the real you and form a friendship.
You may think rock stars are cool and you may be attempting to emulate that image eg appearing standoffish and slightly arrogant. That can work for you if you are world famous as famous people can get away with it! You are not a famous rock star – you need to appear accessible and open.
You dont need to change the way you dress, merely the way you are perceived. However, insuring you are well groomed and tidy does make a difference.
3) Get your body language right
Avoiding eye contact and lurking in corners screams of weirdness. You need to learn how to receive eye contact and approach new people in London. Dont flinch when somebody looks your way or fixes eye contact, look back with a subtle smile. Remember dont try to stare them out as this will appear odd, as will a cheesy grin. Not smiling enough or smiling too much will look strange, learn the middle ground.
4) Dont be the needy sheep
Neediness can come across as obsessive and therefore creepy. Dont follow potential new friends around like a puppy dog when you first meet them. Mingle with others too that way youll look popular and at the end of the night you can come back to the people you really like and get their number.
5) Respect others boundaries
This is the key thing which may cause people to misunderstand you. Everyone has boundaries, overstep them and they are going to think you are weird and creepy. Every friendship has levels, when you first meet people, think of the relationship as being on level 1, you cant go automatically skipping to level 5, again moving too fast you can lead to being be misinterpreted as odd.
On meeting someone, it is impolite to ask personal questions and its quite rude. Sometimes its hard to guess, what the boundaries are; to one person you may come across impersonal, to another you may come across as simply cocky and confident. Try to gauge your potential new friends personality type by discretely listening to their conversation. Stick to “safe” conversation topics such as current affairs events or places in London etc stay away from religion, politics, your love life/romantic experiences and anything on the macabre or dark side. The same goes with butting in, you should only join a conversation if you have something positive to add. If you catch the tail end of a conversation, dont jump in with, “what ya talking about?”.