Do you want to boost your self confidence? Lack of confidence affects your relationships, friendships and your career. Here’s how to improve your self confidence and get on and have a fulfilling successful life in London.

You don’t have to get it right; you just have to get it going. – Mike Litman

Believe in yourself

The best way to build self confidence is to believe in yourself. Try to ditch any negative thoughts by counteracting them with positive thoughts. Each time you hear that, ‘you can’t do it’ voice, tell yourself ‘No. Stop!’ And then use, what I call, your ‘you can do it voice.’ Some people find it helpful if they imagine this voice as that of a positive role model.

Comfort zone

Confidence, and lack of confidence, is not universal. Have you noticed that there are some things which you are very confident doing, whilst there are other things which actually scare you?

The things you are confident about are inside what is known as your ‘comfort zone’. The things which you are unconfident about are outside your comfort zone and you will do everything to avoid them.

He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else. – Benjamin Franklin

The things you are confident about are usually things you have already achieved or have been reinforced by someone telling you are good at it.

The more you choose to stay in the comfort zone the scarier the outside becomes.

Work out what is in your comfort zone and what is outside. What patterns of behaviour do you do to avoid stepping outside of your comfort zone? Recognise these behaviours by using your ‘you can do it!’ voice.

Establish your strengths

Make a list of everything you have to be grateful for – this shows you what you have achieved and what motivates you.

Now write down 10 things you are good at. These can be your greatest skills or achievements. Read the list back – look what you have achieved!

And Weaknesses

Make a list of your 10 biggest weakness and the things you want to become more confident about. Now you have to address each point at a time. Do not try to do too much at once – this needs to be a gradual process.

Trick your mind

For each thing on your list, take a piece of paper or a Post-it note, and write it as if you’ve already done or achieved it and stick it on your mirror or somewhere where you will see it every day.

Every time you see it repeat what you have written. It sounds silly but it really works – it changes negative thoughts and tricks the brain into thinking you has already achieved it. This in itself will help boost your self confidence.

Get your of the comfort zone

Go back to your note written as if you’ve already achieved it. Now do it! The best way to become confident at something is to do it! Try it. How easy was that?!

Quite simply, building confidence is about moving your comfort zone out so it becomes larger. This is step by step process gradually taking on one thing outside your comfort zone.

Get out there and achieve it, extend your comfort zone. Overcoming something which you were previously worried about will boost your confidence – and will affect all aspect of your life.

Surround yourself with confident people

‘Confidence is contagious. So is lack of confidence.’ – Vince Lombardi

Are your friend’s negative people? Are they unconfident? They might be dragging you down. When we are part of group people tend to adopt similar behaviour. If you surround yourself with confident friends in London, you’ll have a much more positive outlook and begin to doubt your doubts – helping you become much more confident.