Mark Andrew

Your eyes met, your smiles matched and numbers were exchanged with hope and excitement.  However, whilst you thought your first date consisted of flowing drinks and scintillating conversation, you never heard from him again. So what went wrong? Read on to discover the magic beans that turn 1 Date in to 10. And there isnt a beanstalk in sight.

1) Dont be too available but at the same time

Hes asked you out but you want to let him know that you have a busy, exciting life right? If he suggests meeting on a Wednesday, politely decline but enthusiastically suggest another day such as Thursday. Even suggest things to do on you date. This tells him that you have a life but youre willing to make space for him in it.

2) Dress to impress but accordingly so

Whilst it may be tempting to show him all of your goods in one go, your aim is to have him wondering what you have to offer.  Thats right girls, that overused phrase less is more will become your new mantra.
You want to dress smart/casual. This is a phrase you will see a lot; possibly on nightclub flyers, invitations etc. It essentially means that if you wear casual jeans, dress them up with high heels.
If you are unsure of the style trend in London, there are great high street stores with websites which sell affordable, on trend fashion such as www.riversisland.com, www.topshop.com www.asos.com and www.boohoo.com to name but a few.
Just remember the cardinal rule! Choose which asset youre going to show off but never show cleavage AND legs. If you want to see him again, leave the mini dress at home.

3) Wear make up but dont over do it

I dont know any girl who would go on a first date without wearing any make up but you need to be careful with your technique.
For example, if bright red lipstick is your trademark look, youre going to need to save it for your third or fourth date. Although most men love to see a girls unique style, anything too striking can be a slight put off so try to keep it neutral on the first date. Keep the base of your foundation light and simply enhance your natural features. As you get to know each other better, hell probably be begging to see you in red lipstick!

4) Maintain eye contact

This doesnt mean that you should participate in some weird, stare out game with your eye balls but intermittent looks in to his eyes whilst hes talking whilst nodding your head subtly, will show him that youre really listening to him.

5) Ask questions

Everyone loves talking about themselves. Fact. You want to express an interest in him so ask him questions about his hobbies, any pets he might have and what his favourite films are. Not only will this give you vaulable information about the guy you could be dating but it will portray you as a great listener. Brownie points overload.

6) Laugh at his jokes

If you can do this, youre halfway there. Inevitably, the guy will be nervous and he his primary objective of the night will be to impress you. Some men act macho, some flash the cash, others…tell jokes. Whether the jokes are funny or not, if you like him; youre going to have to start laughing.

7) Use positive body language

There is abslutely no point in liking someone if youre looking over their shoulder, sitting with your arms crossed and have your legs facing in their opposite direction. All these signs tell him subconsciously that you are not interested in him.
So if you want to see him again, act relaxed. This means behaving in an open manner by having your arms beside you, making sure your knees are facing him (all this stuff matters, trust me) and keeping your gaze on him.

8) Smile

Some girls are unrelaxed, or dont want to ruin their make up or hate their teeth. Whatever the reason, NOT smiling is guaranteed to look ten times worse.
Flashing your pearly whites makes you appear instantly more attractive, approachable and it has the power to relax the people around you…not to mention the uplifting effects it has.
Try smiling at people on the tube…I bet you a fiver they smile back and I bet you a tenner, it makes you feel great 🙂

9) Never do anything more than a kiss

Depending on the kind of guy he is, he may lean in for a cheeky goodnight kiss at the end of the night.
If you want to go in for it, it can be a pleasant way to end the evening and can give you that lovely warm feeling on your way home.
Never, ever do any more than a kiss on the first date. This means not kissing elsewhere, no touching, no more!

10) Offer to go dutch

Although many of us expect the man to pay on the first date and it feels great when he does, it can be unattractive to assume that a man will immediately pay for everything – especially if youve just ordered lobster.
When the bill arrives, notice his body language. Did he reach for the bill? Is he fumbling for his wallet? Has he looked to you for reassurance? If you offer to go halves, hell be reassured that youre willing to be treated as an equal…and hopefully hell end up paying for it anyway!

Above all, make sure youre happy, interested and yourself because usually,  when you really like someone your own mind does the rest.

She was beautiful, intelligent, funny, witty, cool and most importantly, she was with you. Was being the operative word. So what exactly went wrong?

1) Never taking charge

Were you always expecting your girlfriend to decide when and where to meet? Did you just assume that she would take control and sort out the finer details? I bet it was really comfortable chilling out whilst she ran around arranging everything right? Wrong. Now youre single, starting again and having to make new friends in London.
Whilst equal opportunities are revered and welcomed by any girl, the last thing any of us want is another full time job as a relationship planner. So take it in turns, research and make suggestions. Youll soon find that youre feeding off each other which creates an easier way of life and a pleasant heap of  intimacy and respect thrown in for good measure too.

2) No respect

Its that word again! Sorry guys but lets deal with this word early on to get it out of the way. Of course, respect works both ways and it really is that vital ingredient in every relationship.
Every one argues but so many couples revert to below the belt tactics and remarks to try (in vain) to reclaim lost control in a relationship.
No matter how angry you are, always refrain from petty insults, angry comments about one anothers family and friends and snide remarks.

3) Having no confidence

We’ve all known a person who wasnt particularly attractive but somehow, through bags of confidence, somehow appeared to become the most attractive person you ever met. And it works both ways.
So if your confidence is pretty much non existent, you have a lot of work to do before you can possibly be with someone else.
Girls want a man who believes in himself, who knows his self worth and enjoys his own company.
Smothering your girlfriend because youre worried about losing her, or telling a girl shes out of your league and you cant believe you got her is not a good look.

4) Not having a job

Before you all start calling us gold diggers, this isnt because we want a man to shower us with gifts. A man with a secure job, who wakes up every morning and is a standing member of society (sorry to mention that) is as attractive as the day is long. Of course, there are certain situations that men cant avoid such as not having a job because theyve just graduated and this is understandable but if you choose to stay at home whilst your girl is out working and then you have no money to to things, be assured, your days are numbered.

5) Being unhygienic

This may seem obvious but a man who has body odour, stained clothes or bad breath is all too common. A smart and clean appearance shows that you like to take care of yourself and this within itself, is attractive.
Making sure that you and your clothes are clean is not exactly rocket science and in most cases should guarantee you a second date at the least.
I once went out with a guy who showered once a week. Enough said.
P.S. Girls who go out with unhygienic men tell their friends about it.

6) Being too frugal with money

Generosity is an incredibly attractive trait and can sometimes be a reflection of other elements of the mans character.
Im not saying you should flash your cash and splurge every time you go out but showing your girlfriend that you enjoy life and live it to the fullest is a sure turn on…just make sure its your money and not the banks.

7) Not being spontaneous enough

Every relationship reaches the stage where romance gives way to reality and you find yourself in that dreaded rut of routine. This is incredibly normal, however not doing anything about it is not.
A girl likes to be surprised and as Cyndi Lauper once bellowed, girls do just really wanna have fun.
So if you want to keep the passion and excitement alive, surprise her with that weekend away, come home early from work one day for a night of passion and dont ever just roll over and go to sleep night after night. Boredom is a powerful anathema to relationships.

8) Flirting with other women

Yes, we know that flirting is natural and healthy blah, blah, blah. But seeing our man hitting on another woman is front of us is an open and shut case of Youre dumped!

9) Being a selfish in bed

Whilst it may seem tempting to roll over and go to sleep after youve climaxed, you may as well kiss your relationship goodbye in that very same bed.
Women are far more clued up nowadays as to what they want in bed and a satisfied-man-only does not make for a healthy sex life.
If you have trouble knowing what to do, having an open and honest relationship about needs and fantasies can not only be informative but it can also lend itself as another form of foreplay.
If you want to keep her, start spreading the love.

10) Not showing that you love her

You might really think you do, you might tell your friends that you do and you might never want anyone else again but if you dont show that you love her, then shell never know.
Telling her is an abvious one but showing her in subtle ways on a daily basis will result in a more secure relationship. Little thoughtful notes, gifts, listening to her and remembering what she has said, asking her questions about her day, what she has done and what shes thinking will all result in a big smile on her face…and surely thats what brightens your day, right?

They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and whilst we all have different preferences, there are certain things in a member of the opposite sex that when performed correctly, can guarantee a fiery chemistry that will have your date wanting more. Read on to find out the secrets to beign sexy.

1) Make an effort

Chose somewhere nice to go. A venue that is original. Check out things to do for inspiration. Regarding clothing – your dressing gown might be your best friend when youre in front of the t.v. but there are certain times when your clothes, hair and if youre a girl, your make up need close attention. This is one of those times.

2) Look clean and healthy

Research has shown that a tan is attractive because its a sign of good health. This doesnt mean that you should roast yourself under the sun but it does mean that cleanliness = attractiveness. So make sure your hair and breath are fresh and if its summer, your feet are in tip top condition. Dry skin and unmanicured nails is not a good look.

3) Be confident

Looking your date in the eye and having your own opinion is attractive within itself.

4) Be employed

There are certain situations which you cannot control, such as if you have just graduated and youre looking for a job. If however, you have been unemployed for a substantial period of time and youre not trying, this is a top turn off for your date.
Hard-working, driven and ambitious people are sexy.

5) Being polite

It isnt just old people who see common courtesy as an undervalued virtue. Showing concern for others and saying please and thank you portrays your caring side instantly and this is attractive. So when the waitress brings you your drink/food, use it as an opportunty to show that being polite is cool.

6) Smell nice

Whilst it is a real put off when a persons fragrance enters the room before they do, a subtle scent that is fresh and clean can be totally sexy. You can check out some popular fragrances here http://www.theperfumeshop.com/

7) Dress fashionably

This doesnt mean that you have to turn up in the current trend for flourescent yellow anoraks, but a little bit of style wont go amiss.
Ensure that your shoes are clean and that you dont wear more than 3 different colours in any one outfit. You can find some up to date style ideas here http://www.vogue.co.uk/fashion/trends/

8) Be independent

Theres nothing worse than a date who is overly clingy by asking you where youre going or who you are talking to on the telephone or worse, being constantly all over you.
Of course, its lovely to show a bit of attention to your date but giving all of yourself all too soon will reek of deperation. Be interested, be tactile in a subtle way and be warm. Dont be desperate.

9) Dont be afraid to spend

Showing a generous side will inevitably portray you as a generous spirit. Someone who likes to enjoy life and relish the moment is undeniably attractive.
This doesnt mean that have to order Dom Perignon, but steer clear from breaking down the bill when it arrives. Oh and ordering tap water is a sure fire way to never see your date again. Sorry, thats just the way it is.

10) Smile

Yes, its the famous one! It may sound repetitive but smiling really is incredibly appealing. Make sure your teeth are clean and youre good to go. Its an inexpensive way of improving your looks and ultimately people seldom notice old clothes if you wear a big smile. (Lee Mildon).

Living in a vivacious and intrguing city such as London there are so many things to do. That can make choosing a date venue difficult. Where do you start? Read on to discover where to go whether youre on a first date, a tenth date or even if youre going on a date with the city itself!

1) Head first

A first date is nerve racking at the best of times so a relaxing and quiet place with plenty of atmosphere is hot on the list of where to go.
Yauatcha is a unique restaurant serving delicious Dim Sum from midday and also boasts an all day tea house serving 150 varieties of tea.
Opening hours are Mon-Thurs: 11am-11.30pm, Fri-Sat: 11am-11.45pm and Sun: 11am-10.30pm.
For address and details and reviews, click here

2) Too cool for school

Out to impress someone special? Taking the bull by the horns and checking in to an exclusive London bar is sure to score you ample brownie points.
Uber trendy bar Milk and Honey in Soho is an exclusive bar open to members only but it (graciously) allows non members to book in advance by telephoning them.
You can find all of their details here 

3) Nice n Easy

If youre looking for a local pub which is cosy enough to talk but cool enough to stay for afters, The Bobbin in South West London is erm…right up your street.
With delicious traditional food (think bread and butter pudding) and enough character to rival tea at the palace, youll be glad you went.
If youre feeling highly intelligent and want to impress your date, Wednesdays is quiz night. Just dont get too competitive, you want your date to stay until the end!
Clicking here will provide you will all of the important info.

4) Ducking and diving

You might find yourself in a position where youre bored of the standard pub crawl and are after a more quirky, fun filled date. If so, a London duck tour could be the date youve been searching for.
Not only will it give you the opportunity to see London in an overt and interesting fashion, it will also show your date that youre willing to think outside the box and enjoy yourself.
You can find great deals here

5) Show stopping

A trip to the cinema has often been the choice of dates for many, many years. And now you can go traditional with a twist!
The Exhibit in Balham is a boutique cinema which offers romantic seating for you and your date. Housing just 24 people, its the perfect choice for a cuddle (and a sneaky kiss) for the ultimate in  intimate cinema experiences.
Essential details can be found here

6) Monkey business

If you know your date pretty well (and more importantly, you know that theyre an animal lover), a trip to London Zoo can provide a unique, fun day out with plenty of opportunities to take cheesy photos!
Its the only date where youll be able to meet monkeys, amble through the Gorilla Kingdom and marvel and the beautiful Butterfly Paradise Tunnel.
If you want to be really cute, you can take your own picnic and enjoy the view on the many open spaced grassy areas.
Details can be found here

7) Brick a brac

With curry being the nations favourite dish, it would be simply criminal to not enjoy one now and again. And where better to do so than home to the largest Bangladeshi community; Brick Lane!
Sheba restaurant is one of the most popular restaurants which has claimed its fifteen minutes of fame by featuring in Peter Kays John Smiths commercial.
With its modern décor and delicious food, youre definitely on to a winner and we can guarantee that your date will think so too.
To view additional information and to book at table at Sheba, click here

8) Shakesp-air

Not only is visiting the theatre incredibly cultured, you always leave feeling as if youve had a fun day out. With summer fast approaching, what better way to spend a date than at an open air version?
Regents Park provides the ground with the sky as your ceiling. With different plays being shown from now through to summer, including the infamous Lord Of The Flies and an outdoor bar open unitl midnight, youll be spoilt for choice.
For details of how to book and more information, click here

9) Towering love

Self contained buildings with restaurants, bars and brasseries all under one roof are a convenient one-stop-shop to have a great time. Cue the Oxo Tower located on the one and only South Bank of London. With a 250 foot terrace, youll be so consumed by the breath taking views, youll forget why youre there.
The retaurant and brasserie also offer innovative dishes with vegetarian and vegan options available.
Details can be found here

10) Simply London

Finally, if money is a bit tight but your heart is not, taking a stroll along the wondrous River Thames with a couple of sandwiches and carton drinks can take you back to your teenage street romance years. Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament set the scene and the glistening of the river will leave you all soppy and romantic for that perfect midnight kiss.
The best thing about such a city as London is that the amazing views are always open and are free of charge.
For directions, click here

…And if you ever find yourself at a loose end with no one to meet, remember that the city of London is the perfect date. Youre never alone!